Why You Should Stop Making FriendsFeb 07, 2024
Some days you get the bear. Some days the bear gets you.
And while many challenges seem nearly impossible to overcome, especially in the midst of the struggle, there are always lessons to be learned.
Lessons like "don't poke the bear."
Oftentimes your losses may seem to overshadow the wins; however, you must still celebrate your victories. Eventually you'll have a big stack of small wins.
You get the energy to overcome tough times by realizing that you are amazing and that you can succeed.
And those frustrations, they teach you something valuable; but only if you are willing to fail forward.
It's how you react to the losses that shows true character.
“Man does not simply exist but always decides what his existence will be, what he will become the next moment. By the same token, every human being has the freedom to change at any instant.”
- Viktor Frankl
As you know, life can be cut short.
So we pray for the American soldiers fighting, and dying, in remote areas on the other side of the world. We pray for the families of kids who are fighting cancer and other terrible diseases.
My goal is not to be morbid or encourage you to feel sad. It's just the opposite.
Consider this lesson a gentle reminder that you could leave life right now. Let that determine what you do and say and think.
Leave a legacy.
Why You Should Stop Making Friends
For me, one of the major turning points in my life and my professional career was when I stopped seeking out friends and instead sought "allies."
An ally of mine, my coach, taught me this.
And, if you embrace this philosophy, it can be life-changing.
A friend is someone who comforts and consoles you.
A good friend encourages you to be the best version of you.
But some "friends" are actually enablers.
They excuse and justify your shortcomings. They rationalize your failures.
You may feel you need enablers sometimes.
But, if that's all you have, there's nobody to hold you accountable to your best self. That's what an ally is.
An ally doesn't accept you for who you are, but sees you for what you could be, what you want to be.
And, they hold you accountable to continually seeking and honoring your best self.
They push you and challenge you to do better.
And, don't ever make excuses for you.
When you fail and seek their comfort… They give you none.
Instead they ask, "Now what?"
To be blunt, if you want to be successful and actually achieve the things you desire, you need allies in your life.
In fact, the more I've invited allies into my world, the more successful I've become.
So, while you're thinking about the next several weeks, and all the grand things you want to accomplish, make "more allies" one of them.
That one simple resolution, alone, can help you achieve all the others.
In any case, that's how I see my role for you. I'm not your friend. I'm your coach, your ally.
Which is why I hammer away at the excuses and the fluff.
- I won't let you off the hook.
- I won't rationalize your shortcomings or failures.
- I see you for what you could be.
And I'll continue to do so for as long as you'll listen.
Read the next part slowly.
It’s time to take a long hard look in the mirror and decide.
How long will you settle for mediocrity?
Do you truly want to leave a legacy?
Every choice you make determines who you will become and how you will be remembered.
How long can you suffer in silence and deal with the guilt, shame, and overwhelm?
The guilt of breaking promises to yourself and those you love, about prioritizing your health.
The shame of how you’ve let yourself become overweight and unhappy instead of lean and energetic, like you want to be.
The overwhelm and confusion of not knowing what to do and how to change it. That’s not the life you want.
If getting in the best shape of your life is in your plans, my in-person age-management program offers guaranteed results.
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But, fair warning.There's no hand-holding.
I will challenge you throughout.
No more regrets or deliberating. You've waited far too long. You need to take action now.
I'm ready to help you make the transformation you desire and deserve.
But only if you're ready to accept the challenge.
To your success,
Joseph Arangio helps 40+ men and women get leaner, stronger, and happier. He's delivered over 100,000 transformation programs to satisfied clients around the globe. If you want to lose weight from home, with the best online longevity personal trainer, or you want to visit the best age-management personal trainer in the Lehigh Valley, you can take a free 14-day trial.